I made it home to Newburgh after 12 hours behind the wheel. I arrived in the rain at 5:45 p.m. The grandsons all came out to help me get inside. When I got inside, the place looked like a new place. Michael had cleaned up all the clutter, that I had created by purchasing a new kitchen table (that Michael had not asked for). With the addition of a second kitchen table, we had one of them taking up space in the family room. He has moved the extra table down stairs and the family room is beautiful and oh so roomy. The boys all helped their daddy get the house cleaned up of the clutter. All of the "stuff" I had in the kitchen is now in a box on my bed. I cant tell you how wonderful the house looks. I didnt realize how this house should look. Now I have a daily goal of having it look this nice every day. I dont know how Michael stood it. I never knew it could look like this. It is really a lovely home. He also put the captian chairs back in his van instead of in the boys' room. I love it.

The trip was long but uneventful. I got out about eight times to walk around and stretch my legs. My friend, Ronnie Wiggins told me this was important so I would not get blood clots. So far, no clots.

Well, I had a wonderful but very short visit with Ramona, Matthew and Karsen. As I had told you in prior posts, my left leg was really giving me a problem. I stayed in the bed and off of my knee most of Thursday and even Friday. I left on Saturday morning at 9:00a.m. I stopped in El Dorado, Arkansas, because I was going to sleep on the highway. This morning I got up and was on the road before 6a.m. Long, long drive, but pretty scenery. I had just missed the pretty leaf show. I could tell that it was a beautiful sight about two weeks ago. It still was pretty. I love to drive and this trip affords me lots of drive time. The only thing is that it usually takes me about two days to recover from this much time in a sitting position. Ths trip was two days driving and two days in Houston and then two days driving again. Sort of hectic. By Wednesday, I should be fine. I'll let you know.

My knee is almost back to normal. I say in another two days, it will be just like it usually is.

Well, its been a long day and I am tired and will close now.

May God richly bless you my dear ones. jk

It i s now 1:30 on Fridday and I am going topost a short post i think because i dont know how ong this "hook up" to the internet will last.

My left knee is about gone. I am having to use a walker to walk. This driving realy took a lot out of me this time. I have to leave tomorrow and I am getting ready to go to bed to eleviate the pain and to elevate this knee so I will, hopefully, be ready to travel tomorrow morning. I will have to go tomorrow morning whether I feel like it or not. My mercy.. What a predicment I am in.

My prayer is for God to richly bless you contnually. jk

Well I arrived at my house at 3:15 p.m. on Wednesday. I was met by Matthew and Flash, his Italian Greyhound. Ramona and Karsen also came out to meet me and to invite me inside. Karsen held his arms out to me and as I took him in my arms, I realized that Ramona and Matthew had decorated my house for Christmas. It took my breath away. They also had decorated a small tree and placed it in the sitting area of my bathroom. So beautiful. It warmed my heart. Blessings on Jan.







I was suprised at how I felt when I first saw my house. You know I had come home in October for two days, but I was sick at the time and I didnt really get to "see" anything. I was impressed by the beauty of my bedroom and the whole home in general. Because I have these renteres (Matthew and Ramona) there is a bit more clutter than I am used to, but the benefits of having renters, far surpasses the bit of clutter that comes with them. Their company is devine and I get to be by my grandson, Karsen, and watch his every move. Besause I was sick the last time I was here, I was not able to be around Karsen, so this visit is like the first real visit I have had with him since I left in June. Boy, has he grown! He is long and oh, so lean. Precious and another blessing on Jan.









We had decided to have our Thanksgiving dinner on Wednesday so Ramona had already cooked all of the food. It was delicious. She fixed mac & cheese, mashed potaotes, green bean casserole, dressing broccolli casserole, deviled eggs, and she had a cheese and sausage tray for us to snack on while we were waiting for all of the food to be placed on the counter for our buffet. To say the food was delicious is a huge understatement. Ramona is a great cook. Just think, she is taking 18 hours this semester, while taking care of Karsen and Matthew and she still made time to fix this dinner. We are blessed by her in our lives. Oh, I almost forgot, the piece d'resistnce: Matthew made two bowls of banana pudding for dessert.





Our famiy for Thanksgiving consists of Jery & Lisa, Rmna's parents, and Joe & Tanya, Ramona's brother and his girlfriend. We had such a lovely time. Ramona's parents are so easy to love. Please pray for Lisa. She had a headache at our dinner and it grew increasingly more intense as the evening progresses. She had a hedache that remained all through dinner and increased in severity as the evening progressed. She learns the results of a MRI she had done on Wednesday this Friday to determine if there is a brain tumor as her doctor suspects. We are praying for something else more easily taken care of.



It is now Friday morning and I have been unable to post and I have to keep ....it just went out again. I will post even though I am not finished. I will leave tomorrow for the trip home to Newburgh, Indiana. Did I say "home" ? My left knew is really giving me an issue with walking.
May God richly bless you my beloveds. jk

Well I made it to Texarkana by 7:30p.m. and I am calling it a day from driving. I left at 7:30a.m. and drove for 12 hours. I had planned to get out about every two hours to stretch my legs and for the most part, I did. Right now my legs are killing me. It is restless leg that is bad. I would get the restless leg feeling after about three hours of driving. It got sort of bad right before I got to Texarkana. I had gone about four hours without a stretch. Right now I have taken a double dose of the Mirapex medicine. I plan to talk to the doctor, because I seem to need a double dose every once in a while and it is occurring more often than not lately.

I am staying at the Hampton Inn and this room sort of stinks. It smells like someone needed to spray after a trip to the bathroom. Sorry if I am making you sick. I had planned to go to bed early,but I am having a bit of a difficulty getting to sleep. So I thought I would blog for a bit. My plan was to get up ultra early in the morning and leave for Houston, but I will have to wait to see when I wake up. If I wake up early, as is my habit, I will leave early. If I wake up late, then I will leave later.

I looked at the predicted weather in Houston for tomorrow and it is 70. I am wearing a cold weather outfit and will need to get into my suitcase for some warmer-weather clothes when Iget there. I have brought all of my summer clothes home with me, so when I pack in December for the final trip home, I will have less to pack. Rats. I love cold weather.

I have not looked at myself in a full length mirrow since June. ther is one in this room and I am amazed at how huge I continue to be. I have been losing a few grams and it is obvious to me that "grams" is probably the more accurate term to be using. I am disgusted with the way I look. Unbelievable. Pray for me and for the gift of the spirit that I do not appear to possess, that being self-control. My mercy. I am a big woman. Pitiful.

As i drive, I am listening to the Bible on tape and I call my learned friend, Ronnie Wiggins, when I have a question about something I am hearing. He is a fountain of knowledge and really helps me understand more deeply what I am hearing. I am embarrassed to say that I have never read the Bible all the way through. I am 62. Shameful, but I am really enjoying listening. I am presently toward the end of Job. I called Ronnie about three or four times and he seems always willing to take the time to mentor me. I am confident that he will be called tomorrow also.

I received calls today from Lyndsey, Valerie, Vicki and Ramona. Suzy called me after I got to Texarkana and was going into the room 121. These calls helped me a lot to pass the time. Valerie even looked up how long it would take to get from Memphis to Little Rock and from Little Rock to Texarkana. She is a jewel. She is the one who challenged me to get to Texarkana instead of stopping in Little Rock as my body was telling me to do. Right now I am so glad I accepted her challenge and got this much closer to home. I just wish I would get sleepy.

I am going to call it a day for this blog.

May God richly bless you, my beloveds. jk

I am getting ready to tak a nap, since I have been up since 5 this morning. I will attempt to make this short, but we will see if I am able to do"short".

Michael is off this entire week. Pray that his sleep comes and he is able to be rested. He continues to have insomnia and he really looks like someone who has not slept in days. He just came home from taking the boys to school and then going to work to complete some charts. He is currently trying to get some sleep . I will pick up the boys this aftrnoon.

I am in the process of getting ready to go to Houston and my excitement is building. I have spoken with Ramona twice today and I can hardly wait to see them and enjoy their company and hold my Karsen and let him get to know his Grammy some more. Even though I will be leaving on Saturday, I plan to get as much in as possible. I am forgetting how this long trip drains me, but right now I am pumped. Note to Ramona and Matthew: Let me rest a bit the first day I am home and then I will be ready for living the life. I am 62, you know.

My hairstyle is different now. It is a bit longer on the sides and is short, short, short in the back and basically all one length and is basically straight. Of course, I continue to sneak a bit of bouffant into the "look", but it is growing on me and I like it. I am confident it will have To "grow on" my friends and family too. I like it. It is sort of 'styling" for the older set.

I have changed the linens and the hand soap in the bathroom to a purple color of soap, towels and mat for the boys to have a new look while I am gone. The red mat and towels are in the washer as I write and will be folded by the time I leave tomorrow morning. I am trying to teach them a pride in one's surroundings. Every morning they have seen me showered and coiffed and all made up. I am trying to teach them something of a person with initiative even early in the morning.

Well, a nap is calling me. I must respond. I surely dont want to interrupt my sleep patterns.

May God richly bless you, my beloved. jk

Boy was this a beautiful day. The sun was out all day and the cold was crisp but oh so bearable. About 50 after a low in the high 30s. The workers came and finished the grounting of the tile. They said they will be back tomorrow. This really may get finished by Thanksgiving.

The boys all went to church with me today. As I have told you before, I think, this church has class for Michael and Aidan while, Brendan is in the large room for a devotional time and then the childrn play all sort of games: basketball toss, air hockey, a bowling type game on a game board, and many other things. There is a store that the children can use the "money" they earn in their class to purchase junk food or junk toys. Then after an hour of this, the boys switch, with Brendan going to class and Michael jr. & Aidan going to the big room. While all of this is going on I am attending church for the first hour and then my class for the second hour. This works so nicely. My class was on Acts and we were in the second chapter. A great discussion occurred in the class with some very learned and spiritually led men and women mKing great comments in the class. Everyone is around my age or a bit younger or older. The teacher is 46. It was a very rewarding day and I so enjoy the fellowship of fellow believers and the time I spend praising my Lord. Although I love my church at home, I will truly miss this fellowship when I leave. They have been a blessing to me and some of them act as if and have said to me that I have been a blessing to them. Like a family of believers. Wonderful.

The boys played on and off all afternoon. There was a near crisis when it was discovered that the tv screen remains black and we are unable to turn it off. The children just went outside and Aidan had his brother, Michael jr., played with ech other inside for the first time since I have been here. All is great with no tv.

For dinner, I grilled some pork steaks and made some rice and peas. Brendan informed me that he has hated peas since he was a baby. He ate about 10 of them, gagging the entire time. Aidan proclaimed that he liked them. He did not, however, want seconds of the peas. They had applesauce for dessert. The rice Midhael sr, buys is so good. I forget thename of it, but it is etraordinary. Trust me.

Today was a tiring day, but I loved it. It is tiring because there are three boys and if you are not dealing with the three of them at the same time. you are dealing with one of them and they seem to come to you in a successin that does not allow for any down time. I do love nurturing these boys.

I think I may have lost another 2 grams.

Aidan finished three book reports this week end and they are in his back pack ready to turn in tomorrow. I am very proud of him, although he continues to act like all school work is such a pain, he does work to turn in a good finished product. He is a doll.

I plan to make blueberry muffins tomorrow for breakfast. Then I have one more day to get ready to leave for Houston. I plan to work like the dickens tomorrow so I will be able to leave from the school on Tuesday when I drop off the boys at 7:30a.m.

I am going to hit the hay. May God richly bless you, my beloved. jk

Well it is 12:28p.m. and I have just finished getting myself ready for the day. Michael has the day off after his 4 to 11:30 shift (he got home at midnight) and he slept in while I fixed the boys breakfast. I fixed hamburger patties to look like sausage since I was out of sausage and needed to use the hamburger meat up. I also fixed scrambled eggs and cheese. Michael jr. says he doesnt care for scrambled eggs with cheese, but the other boys love them so I fixed them this morning and received "raves" from two of the boys. Since my talk or "life lesson" as my sister, Vicki ,suggested i call my "lectures" Michael jr, ate the eggs without compliment or complaint so, I consider that a victory.

Right now the workers are down in the basement working feverishly to finish before Thanksgiving. Michael sr. called the low-bid bossman and said something that he needed to either finish this up by thanksgiving or to epect michael sr to be at his house on thanksgiving day wanting to know why it wasnot finished. I have a feeling that the worker men will be here every day. I think they are putting the trim up now. I think the floor must be completed. I dont know if they have grouted the tile yet,but it is definitely coming along. Michael sr. and the boys went down to inspect it this moring before they left to go bowling, and all I heard was "oohs" and "ahhs". It really is going to be so nice for them when it is finished.

As I said, the boys are out bowling and Michael sr. is taking care of their dinner so I am "off". Right now my upper back between my shoulders is hurting me because I pulled m feet up to be able to use my ped-egg on the bottoms of my feet and it was a struggle to get my feet up due to the portly nature of my legs in gerneral. However, the swelling in my feet and ankles has completely vanshed. Hallelu...i dont know how to spell that word and I am not going to look it up.

I spoke with Vicki this morning and she and Valerie are going to Fort Worth in order to attend a surprize birthday party for my brother-in-law, Morton Jeffrey. He is a wonderful, wonderful man whom I love just like a brother. Honestly, if he were my own flesh and blood, I could not love him more. He is funny and fun and a man of faith. A wonderful husband to my sister, Suzy, and father to my neices and nephews. A great grandfather too. he has blessed our lives. We used to say my mother loved him more that all of her children. I think she might have really. We understood. He is that great of a man. His birthday was november 14, but his party is today. Happy Birthday, Morton.

My back is feeling better

I think I have purchased all of my Christman presents. They have all been delivered via UPS and they are all at this time in the living room of Michael sr.'s house. I plan to unpack them and rearrange them so I can take Karsen's home with me when I leave this Tuesday. I am honestly getting very excited about this trip. I can hardly wait to get back to my Houston family and to my home my temperpedic. I am excited to see Karsen and Matthew and Ramona. Please be in prayer for Lisa Spurbeck, Ramona's mother. Lisa is having headache after headache and is trying to get insurance approval for the MRI the doctor is wanting to do. He feels it may be a brain tumor. Lisa's mother had a brain tumor and there is fear that this is a familial thing. Please pray for Lisa. She is so sweet. Pray for her also, because her husband, son and his girlfriend are needing to have Lisa be strong for them because they are having such a difficult time dealing with this possiblilty. Then Ramona, is having to be strong for her mother when her mother calls ramona. Ramona, is so sweet and loving and is trying to finish up her college career this sememster and take care of Karsen and Matthew and her family. She really is so busy she is running on auto-pilot i think. Please pray for this entire situation.

Well, I think I will go and get about the "busyness" or "calmness" of the day, whichever I feel like.

May God richly bless you all, my beloveds. jk

Yesterday I was busy all day and didn't have time to do anything other than the things I do everyday. Michael is off today, but I told him to sleep in today, since he worked till midnight, and that I would take care of getting the children up and to school.

This morning I gave them a choice for breakfast. I served one oatmeal and the other two, cereal. Easy as pie. However, there was another event of a morning. Delima of the morning: one of the dogs had pooped on Aidan's toys and Aidan stepped in it and wiped his foot off on Michael jr.'s coat. This was a delima and deserved dire consequences. I told Aidan to get in the shower to remove the poop and I gave him his punishment which is: on Friday, when I plan to give them one hour to play with their friends in their old neighborhood, Aidan will not be allowed to play, but will sit in the car with me. (I am actually looking forward to that.) I did not find any poop on Michael jr.'s coat, but I cleaned at it anyway. I gave it the OK after I gave it the "smell test" and it came away smelling like a rose. All was well.

On my return trip, I stopped by Starbuck's to get a tall non-fat, decaf, latte with a shot of vanilla and one splenda. I took the first gulp of the hot brew and immediately felt alive and prepared for my "day off" and the activities of my choice. I then went to Rawlgreens to pick up a perscription and then did a little Walgreens shopping.

Now I am home. My hands are so dry and daily I put cream on them several times. They continue to be dry, so today at Rawlgreens I purchsed some Burt's Bees Hand Repair Cream. This may do the trick, although it smells to high Heaven and I think it has cleared up my sinuses for good. I may need to get some for Lyndsey , for i feel it will clear up any health malady that continues to plague her, especially sinus issues.

I think I will rest today, then get caught up on the laundry. I will straighten up too. I am not sure if Michael willl cook the supper tonight or if I will do it.

Michael is so tired and is continuing to have difficulty sleeping with the schedule he has been working. He has been working lot and is nearing exhaustion, I believe. He had incurred many expenses as a result of his medical issues in July and the ensuing month off work. I believe he schedules about 15 work days a month normally (this --15 days--is what they paid him for in the month of August when he was off recuperating), and then he fills in as much as they need which is really every day. He feels he will be able to take some time off when January comes. Pray for him. He is choosing to bear the burdens of life alone- without the sustinence that comes from an involed relationship with our Lord. It is so obvious to me the toll this is taking on him. Please pray for him and his return to his Father God, and the ensuing revival of his spirit.

Also pray for Matthew (Matthew I know you are reding this :-) I love you ), that he will hold on to the Lord's hand and that he and Ramona return to the fellowship of the saints. It is so easy to drift away and rationalize non-attendance until non-attendance becomes the habit instead of faithful attendance. Belive me, I KNOW this is true. I have lived it. I thought I was so close to God and I was drifting all of the time. I am so thankful to the postman, whom I believe was lead by God to my door, for his encouragement to me to get back into the fellowship and for his recommending Champions as the place to go. I would probably never have chosen Champions, but it is the place for me and the Lord has blessed me at this church. Immediately, I realized the situation I had allowed myself to feel very cofortable in, and what I had been missing. I thank God for His patience with me as I struggled with so many things.

The worker- men have been working very hard for the last couple of days and have almost completed tiling the entire basement floor. They told me that they will be working on it in December. The fast-talking saleman/low-bid-guy had told me they would be finished by the end of this week. The workers told me that he tells everyone that, but since there are only two workers, they will probably not finish until the week after Thanskgiving. Then they may need more days. I just found out that the plumber will have to return to install the toilet and sink. I thought these men would be able to do that too. They have done everything else so beautifully, even though they are a bit past the deadline of July 18.

It is supposed to get to the low 40s today. Right now it is 35. It is overcast and is predicted to be overcast all day. This cold is bearable because there is no wind today. My coat arrived yesterday as well as some warm pants and a warm top. The other two tops I purchased are a smaller size for when the weight begins to fall off. The larger-sized shirt I am presently wearing fits loosly. Pray for that too.

Well, I hope you all are doing well and are healthy and are thanking our Lord God Almighty for each new day He has provided for us. Praise Him and His goodness and His faithfulness. May He richly bless you , my loved ones. jk

The day began with a lecture from the Grammy to her three grandsons about obeying her the first time she says something and that Grammy is the boss. The lecture went on for about 4 to 5 minutes as we were driving to school. I told them that I am used to children obeying me the first time I softly say something. This was said by me in an angry voice. It was not as harse as mother's but it was harsh for me. Well, this afternoon and evening have been devine. All of the boys are obeying me the first time. I did have to punish both Michael and Aidan in the car on the way home from school, but they obeyed and were silent all of the way home, which was the punishment I meted out. . Brendan was in the front so he and I chatted all of the way home. Honestlly, I feel this lecture was a long time coming and we have had the best evening ever. So peaceful as far as them obeying me the first time I ask them or tell them. In the past it has been that they obey eventually after they do what they want to do first. Sometimes I was asking them to do something and would have to ask them many many times. They would finally do it, but always begrudgingly. I feel a victory was achieved today. My plan is to be consistant and have the rest of the days be like this afternoon and evening.

For supper, I grilled hamburger steaks and fixed some noodles and green beans with carrots. Last night they protested so loudly about the mixed vegetables (green beans and carrots) and they were astonished when I fixed them again tonight. Yestrday I cooked them to mush and today I cooked them perfectly. Brendan says he does not like mixed vegetables, so I moved the carrot (one carrot) off his plate. They all ate without any argument and this was a first. I have started the practice of us gathering around the stove and serving each plate from the pot or pan. Then we head to the table where we sit and enjoy our meal. Mealtime has always been a good time for us, but there was always something at least one of them complained about. Not tonight. Great mealtime together.

I took the boys to school today, because Michael sr. worked later than the usual midnight and he is continuing to have insomnia. He has suffered with this since the July "episode". There is a peace that passes all understanding, but Michael sr. is not receiving that at this time in his life. Pray for him and for these precious boys.

I love you and miss you all. I am going to bed right now. The swelling is now only on my right ankle. My foot is not swollen. My toes are back to their usual spread-out positions. When my foot was swollen, all of my toes got to know each other for the first time in 62 years. Now they are back to believing that they are the only toe on each foot. Life is good.

May God richly bless you, my loved ones. jk

Michael is working 4 to midnight for the next three days. Because of this, he is taking the boys to school today, tomorrow and Wednesday so he will be able to see them. He is off on thursday, and then works Friday, Saturday and Sunday. I think I have already written this. Sorry. Today I got up as usual and fixed their cereal and repacked the backpacks from the washed backpacks that had been washed in the washing machine due to the vomit incident of yesterday. The boys and I had a good morning breakfast time together and then they left with their daddy. Aidan had not vomitted since yesterday at 5 and so he went to school. I am sticking close to the phone in case the school calls. I feel he will be fine.

I made an appointment at Dr. Detail for tomorrow morning at 9 to have my car cleaned out. The vomit is splattered on the floor of the right side of the back seat, and on the side of the seat in the back right. I cleaned it out a bit more this morning. Thank goodness for the 30 degree weather because the smell is non existant. I did, however, spray it heavily with fabreze.

This will be a work day of straightening around the house until I pick up the boys at 2. I am looking forward to it. I hope you have a great day. I leave for Houston a week from tomorrow. I am excited about that. I hope my ankle swelling subsides by that time. love you. jk

What a day this has been and it aint like being in love.

First, church was good. I was too late for 9a.m. service so I went to the 10:45 service. I enjoyed it very much. It seemed that the people in this service were older, my age and older. It was nice. I prefer the 9 a.m.

The boys are presently showered and in their beds asleep. To say there was a bit of a fiasco when I went to pick the up is a gross understatement. I do not want to go into the detail that I feel is necessary for you to "get" the entire story here. Suffice it to say, their mother was furious with me, ordered the boys out of the car saying, your grandmother is being selfish and stubborn so get out of the car fright now. What a mess. I am confident that the boys will realize when they get older what this situation was all about, but right now they are put right in the middle of it and I am unable to stop her ranting and I say nothing. What in the world is going through their minds while they are in the midst of this? .Precious boys.

Anyway I finally left with the boys and precious Aidan vomitted all over the back seat of the car. What a mess. When he came home he showered first and I allowed him to drink some of my zero calorie vitamin enhanced water and put him to bed. After talking to him about what he had been eating, I feel this is a result of junk he ate this week end and not a virus. I hope this is the case. They all bragged that they had not showered all week end and Brendan was thrilled to tell me that he had on the same underwear today that he had on Friday and it had not left his body except for when he pulled them down to go to the bathroom. Needless to say all of their clothes are in the washer. I had to wash their backpacks and Michael's coat because of the vomit. We will have to replace Brendan's backpack because it wasnt washing machine ready.

A little girl named Cadence stayed the week end with the boys and their mother. The litlel girl has known the boys because her mother has babysat the boys for a year some time ago. I believe that their mother is planning to have Cadence's mother, Jamie, move to Indianapolis with them and particpate in the care of the home and the boys with their mother. In other words Cadence's mother, Jamie, would take the place of Grammy in their home. Jamie looks like she is 17 I am sure she is older than that because cadence is 4. Jamie, may not even know abouthis, but i heard Michael talkinga bout it to Karen on he phone. Michael is used as his mother's confidant and advisor. What a life.

My foot remains swollen, but not nearly as much as yesterday and the days past.

Michael and I had an air clearing today and I feel it has been very beneficial. pray for us. I hope you have a wondrful evening and a grest tomorrow. love to you from me. jk

Good morning! It is overcast and 33 degrees with a high projected to be 48. This may be a day for my furry clogs. I've got to hunt for my warmest top. I dont have a coat or a sweater. I may need to make one purchase. I am just now rising and will get my breakfast and may be back before i go to church. Have a wonderful day. jk

My third posting of the day and it is only 11 a.m. I love my new hair cut and the color is really pretty. I think this girl has been subtly changing the color to not be so brash and it is still red, but more of subtler color. I love the cut. I will see her on December 20 for the last time and I will be able to show you the result of her efforts. I really like it, can you tell?

Michael texted me this morning and he is working the 6 to 3 shift and will be working sun, mon, tues, and wed from 4 to 1. His first day off will be Thursday. This, of course, means I will have the chidren exclusively through wednesday night. Hopefully all will go well and my swelling will remain down.

The dogs have made another trip outide to use the restroom and upon their return indoors, have left a new set of muddy prints on the floor. I will get to it sometime, but not now.

It is arounnd 40 degrees and dreary with drizzling rain. Tomorrow is supposed tobe cold, but dry and sunny. Cold is juch easier to enjoy when the sun is up. I am so glad God made the sun to rule over the day. The moon has been especially pretty lately as it rules over the night sky.

I may take a nap before I begin any task today. love to you. jk

I just let the dogs out when I posted the last blog entry. It is cold and rainy here so I watched from the warmth of the house as they both used the restroom in the yard. I made myself a protein drink and then called them to come in. The precious dogs came barrelling in with mud all over their paws and now all over the kitchen, but you know how much I love the challenge of the kitchen floor. It gives me something to write about instead of the topic of periodic lonliness. Life is good. God knows I do best when iIhave something to accomplish and I thank Him for the rain and the didt that turns into mud and for the paws of the dogs and for my eyes that can see the pawprints and my brain that knows immediately that the mud smudges are without a doubt from the filfthy paws of the dogs. Now I do have a task to accomplish. Let's see how long I will blog about the dirty floor before I clean it. I am confident that I will find other things to clean in an attempt to put off mopping the ditchen floor. The laundry is totally caught up. Life is good in Newburgh again. love you. jk

The swelling has greatly diminished and for the first time in several days, i am able to see my right ankle and see that it is slim.. The swelling is definitely down, but slightly observable by me. If you looked at my feet and ankles, you might think they are back to normal, but I can tell that they are slightly swollen. The swelling appears to have risen to my upper calf and knee area. This swelling is slight. Of course, you know I have portly upper thighs and it appears as if my upper calves and knees have decided to join in with the portliness of my thighs, however, the calves and knees do not seem as committed to portliness as my upper thighs. If you have been praying about this, i thank you.

Michael has left the house and I feel he must have gone to work today, prehaps the 6 to 3 shift. I didnt speak with him at all yesterday. I teted him thismorning at 5:58, but never received a response. He came homw yesterday around 4 and went for a nap. Then he left around 6 to go out to eat with a friend. When he got home, around 9 I was already in my room with my door closed. It could be lonely, except for the fact that I do have possession of these "wonderful" large dogs all day. If Zulu didnt slobber to the max, she would be the perfect dog and I really like Snowball, but she is the one who spitefully, i believe, uses the house as her restroom. So I let her out all of the time and have to watch her like a hawk so she wont squeeze out the hole in the fence. Yesterday, I climbed down the stairs on the outside deck and drug a large piece of plastic in front of the gapping hole in the fence and lifted a large cement block to weigh the piece of plastic down so Snowball would not be able to nudge it away and get out. She appears to be a scary dog to others because of her consistent barking and growling, She is a good dog, but if she did get out, it might be a case of a personality change and she might not be so kind if she were to perceive someone being unkind to her.

I go to get my hair done this morning and as i said yesterday, probably will go to the market.

I hope my ankles dont swell since I am up and not lying down. My goodness! I guess I do "lie" sometimes. I must tell my grandchildren. just kidding

i might possibly write more when i get back to the house. Enjoy your saturday. I will be enjoying mine. love you. jk

The sun came out once today and when I went outside to be with the dogs, it was lovely and so peaceful. Michael's backyard is large and steep after about 15 yards. It slopes down to a "holler" with a little dry creek running through it. He has many trees between him and his neighbor in back. However, with the falling leaves, it is amazing how really close he is to his backyard neighbors. The thick foliage conceals this nearness during the spring and summer months.

Now it is overcast and dreary. The boys are staying with their mother this week end in Evansille. sSe is meeting them at their bus stop by their old house and will keep them for the week end. At this time I do not know when she will deliver them to Newburgh. But you can tell the plans have changed, since I am not meeting her half way to deliver the boys to her and pick them up. I am really glad about this as my feet are continuing to be swollen with little respite after the night. The right ankle never goes all the way down, but the left one will go almost all the way down when I awake in the mornings. Right now, as I sit at the computer, I can feel the tightness increasing in both feet. In a minute I will lie down and elevate them.

I took the boys to school this morning and went to Rawlgreens to pick up a few things before coming home. Tomorrow morning I have a hair appointment at 8 in the morning and I plan to stop by the market to get some meat items.

Michael is working the 6 to 2 shift today. The boys told me that Michael sr. will be working until next tTursday. I havent talked to Michael about this. When he is taking care of the boys I try to stay away fom their interactions and let them have their family time. Consequently, I dont always know what is in the "offing".

I heard the weather man say that Kentucky may have some snow flurries tomorrow. The reason that is significant to me is that Kentucky is just an inch away from Newburgh. I have told you of times when I have taken a wrong turn and ended up in Kentucky. It is funny to be in a state where you can just run into another state while driving around. In Texas that, of course, could never occur.

Not much gong on here. Looking forward to the freedom this week end affords. I feel the need for respite. I am still a bit emotionally fragile. "Fragile" is too strong a word. I am sort of "bent" in the emotional area. Perhaps that is a better word than "fragile".

Have a wonderful time with those whom you call dear. You are dear to me. jk

Michael is in full control of the boys today.

I did take them to school, which, as I have said so many times, I enjoy to the max. He is picking them up from school and is taking them to a movie and out to eat. So Iam free for the day and that is needed very much right now. Last night both Brendan and Aidan came in the middle of the night, separately, and said they had bad dreams and they wanted to get into my bed with me. Well, needless to say, I did not sleep well. In fact I slid out of the bed at 4 this morning and could hardly get up off the floor due to the slickness of the hard wood floors. I just stayed up. I took a nap as soon as I got home from the school run.

Now i am doing laundry with plans for some reading if I get everything done I plan to do with the house and tidying up.

I have been drained of energy both physically and emotionally lately. I wish I could discuss it here , but suffice it to say, that these boys are being brought up to believe that someone is the villain in their lives and that person is to blame for anything that does not go as they feel it should. Michel jr. is the worst at this. I have been the villain. He is either loving on me and telling me how much he loves me or he is treating me as if every wrong thing is my fault and that I am blaming his mother for things when I havent even mentioned her or the topic he is discussing. It just comes out of the blue. Aidan, the 7 year old, told me yesterday after one of michael jr.'s outbursts against me, that Michael has a problem. This behavior is what is modeled before them. Brendan has it a bit, but he is getting better and he doesnt blame me for things anymore. Michael jr. seems to be getting worse at it. This is so sad. He is so adept at getting off subject and accusing me of doing and saying things I have not done or said, and if I deny it, then he cries out at me with "So you are calling me a liar?" and if ia mnot careful the roller coaster ride beginsl I just calmly say "I did not call you a liar, and I am not going to argue with you." This is so sad. Well, I guess I just discussed it here. Please pray for these boys, and know that I never say anything negative about anyone. Michael sr used to be the villain and now, evidently that is the role I am playing. If I think about it, I would rather have the role of the villain, if someone is to have it instead of their daddy. Now I feel better about this already.

My ankles are swollen almost all of the time and I dont know why. Even in the morning they are swollen. They do not hurt, I just wish I knew what I am doing or what I need to stop doing to make this aggrivation cease.

I will go now and finish what I have begun. I love you all so much. God has promised to never leave us comfortless. Isnt that wonderful? He has never left me, I can attest to that. love to you all. jk

Well, I took the boys to school this morning and once again we had a great ride to school. This time it was the conversation we shared, because the loveliness of the leaves is in the last throse of its holding-on-to-my-leaves right before the winter and the trees await the only beauty I guess they will possess during this new season, and that is the beauty of snow on their bare branches. Conversation with my grandsons, however, is wonderful and is not dependant on the seasons for its beauty.



The boys are gearing up for our departure from each other. They are ralizing that a long visit like this probably will not occur again. They are very excited about going to live with their mother, but know they will miss our time together. I am trying to let them know that this time we have had is a gift to us from God and we have been able to just deepen our love for each other. If we do not get to be together like this again, it is fine because we have our wonderful memories of this time. (I reminded them that these memories are preserved in our hearts and in the pictuees we had made at the photographer .)Even the times when I have been, as Brendan puts it occassionally in his nightly prayers, "a pain in the neck". Brendan was asking me last night, if I will be alive when he is 25. He said, "Isnt that when a person leaves their home?" I said that "A person usually leaves home when they go to college at 18". I think he was thinking that he would come live with me when he leaves home at 25. I have so enjoyed this time with the boys. I pray and I invite you to pray for God to surround them and protect them in the life they are evidently having to live at this time. I see their love for their daddy and that does bring me joy. However, their daddy does not hold to a belief in God and that creates a great void in his "fatherhing" of these precious souls. Their mother regularly shares a skewed knowledge of God as she seeks to gain control of their thoughts. She continues to undermine w=thingsMichael does to discipline them. It is scary to me. Please pray for God's protection and for a preservation of their child-like faith in Him. Hlep the seed to germinate and them to have a desire to read His word to find the truth. (Actually, please forgive me for my hautiness and pride. I do not want to tell you what to pray for them. I ask that you pray for them whatever our God puts on your heart to pray.) They are so vulnerable and yet so strong. I wish I had more time wth them, but I know I am needed to help with Karsen. Please pray that the time I have left with them, is condoned and led by God almighty. This is my mission at this time.

I really dont know if I will see the time that Michael returns from his prodigal ways. This saddens me so, but I know that I am to cling to my Lord and Savior. I always felt my purpose was to raise Godly children . The only one I am certain about is my precious Mandy, who is safe in the arms of Jesus, as i write. My precious Matthew believes and so does Ramona and they both have been emersed for the remission of their sins, but they do not have a church home. Karsen will not learn by osmosis. I know Matthew and Ramona are reading this, and I want them to know that I know they are Christians and I derive joy for them from that. I just know how Satan is seeking to devour all of us and this life is hard and we get such strength for the journey by gathering with fellow Christians and uniting in our worship to God. Karsen would benefit from this right now in the classes he would be attending and in the nursery during the sermon. I know that Bill Rascoe would be their favorite, right after our Lord, of course, and they would revel in the love and strength that comes from fellowship with fellow believers.

It is overcast here for the second day in a row. "Sprinkles" as they forecast here are predicted for another day and then sunshine on Friday. In Texas we would say"drizzling rain" predicted off and on all day. Either way, I guess, it gets the message across.

I took a nap when I returned home from taking the boys to school.

I am thinking of Lyndsey and her best freind, Sandy, who is visiting Lyndz in NYC from California. I am knowing they are having a blast. There has probably ot been a single break in their conersation since Sandy landed. Bless you Sandy, and i trust that you girls are reveling in every minute.

Friends are our gift from God, especially when we share our faith in Him. You are my friends and I thank God for you and the role we play in each other's lives.

May God richly bless you, my beloved. jk

Finally a bit of time for me to post news of the day. Today was a holiday, Veterans' Day, and the day the boys and I went to have our pictures made. It was raining when we went in to the studio. Fortunately we did not get too wet. The darlings were a bit hyped up when we got inside the studio. The ceilings are very high and the boys discovered a slight echo, which they found very entertaining for a while. We were the only customers there at the time and I believe this gave the boys a sense of freedom. They responded appropriately to me when I told them to get their feet off the couch and again when I told them to stop sliding on the floor on their stomachs and again when I asked them to stop the "crab walk" races. The photographer was good with them and he did take control. They responded appropriately to the photographer when he asked them to keep their feet off of the wall. All in all, it really was a very good eperience and we got a good shot of us together. I seclected only one pose and I will have a picture of my own, some for them and I think 3 wallets. I am very pleased, but I do hae a portly look about me that shines clearly in this picture. I am so glad I did this. This has been such a wonderful time for the boys and I to be together, and this picture will dhronicle this time we have shared together.

I love seeing them with their daddy when he gets home from work at a time when they are still awake. Today Michael worked 8:30 to 5:30, but he worked an etra hour and got home around 7. Tomorrow he works 4 to 1 and the boys will only see him for a bit when they get home from school, unless Michael takes them to school tomorrow. He did not tell me he was going to take them to school toorrow, so I will take them. We are out of cereal and I am not sure what I will fix. I do have some sausage and some biscuits and some "cherry butter" made by the Amish. So that may be it. I also have some milk.

I havent spoken about the Veterans' Day program Brendan had at school on Monday. I got there late and only saw the last 20 minutes of the program. He was on the top row and looked so handsome. He was looking around and when he saw me, he was grinning ear to ear. They sang the militry songs for all of the armed forces groups we have. At one point all of the veterans were asked to stand for us to aplaud them. Our applause lasted an extra long time. I thought this was so poinient and so good for the children to see our respect for those who have served us in the armed forces.

When the program was over, I realized that their mother had been there too. She was planning to stay for lunch with all of the boys and she asked me to stay with her and I did. That was really enjoyable. The boys all were very attentive to both of us and kept introducing us to everyone. Aidan was so cute. He kept pointing to each of us and saying, "My grandma and my momma" Sometime he woud point to his mother and say "granma" and to me and say "momma" and he got a real kick out of this. He has told me how I dont look like a grandma and that I am pretty. (This of course, thrills me to pieces. ) I think it is because of the heavy make up that I am never without that makes him say that. I color my hair and the cane doesnt even bother him. Its my heavily made up face and colored hair that make me a pretty grammy. He calls me "Grammy" but when he talks about me he says "Grandma". When all of the lunches were over Karen and I parted. It was pleasant, however, I am always on pins and needles. When I got home, she had asked Michael, if he would ask me to drive half way to meet her when she picks up the boys. this Friday and drops them off on Sunday afternoon. I, of course, quickly said "yes" and dredded it as soon as I had walked out of the room and the plans had been finalized. I am such a goof. Michael had already told her he wasnt going to drive to meet her that she could drive all the way here if she wanted to see the boys. This is becuase she is so erratic in the times one is to meet her. What a mess. Oh well, I will be driving half way up toward Indianapolis this Friday to deliver the boys and then again on Sunday afternoon to get the boys.

Tonight I had them pick up around the house and in theor room and to get their clothes out of my room. They all slept in my room last night because there was no school today. Michael jr, in the bed with me, continually asking me to "move over" and then Brendan and Aidan packed like sardines on pallets on the floor. The challenge is to make my way through the maze in the middle of the night when I need to go to the bathroom. I have cleaned up a bit and there is more clear space on the floor right now. But, we have a rule that the boys sleep in their own beds on school nights. This is good, because I never sleep well when I share my bed with one of my little squirming grandsons.

I hope and trust you all have had a grand day. Hopefully you were able to see and tell a veteran "thank you" today. We do live in such a blessed nation. We are a blessed people because we call God "Father" and he hears us, and knows the number of hairs on our head. love love jk

It is cold here. When I went out to get my prescriptions at Rallgreens right after I made my initial post of the day, there was "frost on the pumpkin", and ice on the car windows. It was 34 degrees up from a low during the night of 29. It is supposed to rain tomorrow and Wednesday and then just be cold on Thursday. I wonder when it will snow. Boy, it is cold here. jk

Michael just left with the boys in tow. He is then driving himself to his 8:30 to 5:30 shift. So I am "off" until pick up time a 2:45. Hope their mother has gone back to Indianapolis and not still at the house when I go to get the boys. I feel I must be ever vigilent in my thinking and be prepared for any possibility because you all know I dont do well when I am just surprised with some situation.

I plan to call the school and find out when Brendan's program is this morning and be there for that this morning. He looked so nice this morning with his kacki pants, black belt, black shoes and socks and his royal blue Tiger Toons polo shirt. He appeared to be so excited and proud. He, like the others, is so dear.

Well, I must be about the busy ness of the day. Looking forward to it. I think Iwill wear my fur-lined crocs today so I can enjoy my toasty feet in this cold Newburgh weather. It is only about 47 right now. Supposed to have a high of 60 something.

I love you all. Hope this is a wonderfully bright day for you. Let us remember whose we are and represent in this world. jk

I have swept the floor, i have mopped and finidhed the taks set before me this day. Now I await what is prepared for me on the morrow. (Can you tell that I am trying to parallell my description of my life with that of the apostle Paul? It makes me feel that my tasks have a greater purpose than they actually have.) Alas. My back possess a slighty discomfort, however, i am ready to receive my grandsons. They are presently 5 minutes late getting here. I hope they get here soon so Michael sr. has time to get Brendan's kacki slacks at Target. Their mother always has a plan, so hopefully she will get them here in a minute or two.

Michael, changed my tire with the Lexus tools provided. The spare is actually a real tire and not one of those skinny spares. Matthew, do you think I should buy a new tire, or do you think I should have this one fixed and just keep it as the spare. I plan to leave the "spare" on as the real tire, since it is a real tire. I am just needing to replace the "spare" for my trunk. Do I get this one repaired or purchase a new one? If I dont hear from you, I will just go with what the tire man tells me when I take the car out tomorrow. Michael sr is working tomorrow 8:30 to 5:30 and will take the boys to school tomorrow. I will be "off" until I have to pick them up tomorrow at 2:45. I plan to take the car during my "off" time to take care of the tire sitation.

Life is so good. Love the Lord and serve the Lord and He will greet us at the gate of Heaven. or maybe Jesus will or maybe angels or maybe Mandy and/or mother and daddy and grandmother. It will be grand. I love to you all. jk


By the way, this very minute the boys got home. It is 6:16 and ty are here. Brendan is crying.

Church was a wonderful celebration of our Lord God and Savior Jesus Christ this morning.
Did I tell you that they pass out communion all at once and let us hold it and take it when we are ready? This is such a precious time. It is between me and my Lord. I pray and remember and try to maintain my focus on the sacrifice that was made out of such a deep love for me by my Savior and Lord. Then I take the communion and pray some more. The whole church is silent while this is occurring. There are cup-holders on the back of the pew in front of me where I put the used cup.
This morning I was a minute late and I had to sit on the front pew with the ministers. I think people thought I was going to say a few words. Just kidding. Although, I did think the minister was a bit shocked to see me there, but whispered to me that he was glad I found a seat. We stand alot when we sing and it was during song that the preachers come up front while we are all standing. Once again, wonderful praise service and great communion with my fellow "emersed believers". That is a phrase they use.
It is cold in Newburgh today and since I dont own a coat, I purchased some fur-lined crocs and that and a long-sleeved sweater-type top is what I wore to church this morning. I tell you, them thar fur-lined crocs keep one's feet pretty toasty. It was about 42 degrees. There is no sunshine today, just cold. Dry and cold. I am loving it. My window is shut.
The boys' mother is returning them tonight at 6. Michael will go out with Brendan to purchase some kacki pants for his program tomorrow.
I have already made an appiontment for Tuesday, Noember 11, at 10 a.m. to have my picture taken with the boys on their school holiday for Veteran's Day. Now, I understand from Michael sr. that she is planning to get them after my picture session. I pray, literally, that she will not say she is gping to get them and bring them to me prior to our photo session. I plan to call the photographer on Monday and let them know that if she shows up and asks to be incuded in the pictures to say they cant do that. I must be prepared for anything. The last I heard from Michael, is that she is going to come pick them up at the studio after our session. My mercy.

Now for all of my many readers (again, just kidding, and trying to make me feel so popular) the "Bill" who first gave the response of the verse in Revelation, is my favorite fellow Christian at Champions church in Houston. He has also been my Bible teacher and preacher. He is about 36 and is the Involvement minister at Champions. God has blessed him with wisdom, a strong desire to serve God and a charisma that draws the masses to him. I love him. He has a wife and a son, Walker, who is the church's love and mascot. Everyone is always watching Walker and commenting on everything he does. He is naturally just a doll. He is about 2 but looks like he is 4 and never met a stranger. I think he will be like his dad. I dont know Robin, Bill's wife, very well, and she may rub off on Walker some too. I just know that Bill is a chosen man of God and I am privileged to know him and learn from him. I also laugh at his every word,unless he is talking about the Bible. You all will get to know him in Glory and we can all laugh then. I wish he was rleated to us by blood so we could enjoy him at our family functions. Pray for him. He is such a blessing to so many, and he knows that liars go to the lake of fire.

I have taken a nap and am geting ready to go give the attempt at the kitchen floor and the cleanliness thereof. I dont know how far i will get.

I plan to leave here on Tuesday before Thanksgiving, arriving in Houston on Wednesday afternoon, and return on Saturday arriving in Newburgh on Sunday. I am so excited.

I pray for your health and safety as I am away from you. God has blessed us all with so many gofts and our love and friendship is one of those gifts. The greatest gift, of course, is our shared bond in our love for our God and Savior. I love you all. jk

My tire is flat. Michael will take care of it for me tomorrow. I will drive the van to church tomorrow.

The boys mother is mad at me, so I guess my premise was in error. My understanding in getting the information from Michael sr today, is that she is upset because I told the children that the Bible says "all liars go to hell."

Where is the verse in Revelation that says "Liars go to hell"? I thought it was Rev 21:12, but that aint it. Everyone who gets me the correct verse from Revelation, will get a prize from me. I will give you the prize as soon as I see you. Be assured of receiving a prize if you are a winner, because I am not a liar.

I am going to bed. I think I might crack the window a bit for some fresh air. It's important to have fresh air isnt it? I have never gotten fully warm today unless I were in the van or the butcher shop.

A revelation occurred during my nap.
Brendan asked me to come stay with them in Indinapolis for a visit when theymove up there with their mom. Last night he asked me to come withthem for this weekend. I responded that I wouldnt go (in a nice grandmotherly way)
...Hmmm. I think there may be more to this offer than I originally picked up on.
The other day Karen asked me to come to Indianapolis to help the boys get settled in and I said no. I made an excuse of needing to get back to Houston to help out with Karsen, which is true.
I am now wondering if the boys' task has now become to convince Grammy that there is a way for her to stay with them. She just has to go with them to Indianapolis.
I must prepare for this possible onslaught and you can pray for me.
I am going to the store. It is still cold. I may shut the window. love to you. jk

Iam up, dressed and have already had my first cup of coffee. Since I have no clothes for really cold weather, I have purchased myself some wintery shoes to loll around in. I have some fur-lined crocs.. I have a blue pair and a brown pair. They are so warm and I love hem. I am wearing my brown pair for the first time and my feet are just the right temperature of "toasty".

I have on a green sweatshirt and striped pants. I continue to be a bit cold, so I may lower the window. I love this weathher.

The boys are with their mother for the week end. Michael jr. is supposed to go to a birthday party today. I will find out if he got to go when they return. The boys told me, but not their daddy and Michael sr. is going to talk to their mother to determine if the following is a fact, that their mother is taking them to school on Monday. Brendan also reported that he needs a pair of kacki slacks for Monday's program, as he walked out of the houe to the car on Friday to go to his mother's. So she will hae to get that for him. I just thought of something, that perhaps she is taking Brendan and the boys to school on Monday because Brendan is in a program and I had said that I wouldnt be able to attend and perhaps she is planning to attend. I dont know. This program is a program that only Brendan had told me about. It is their schools Veteran's Day program. Since I had heard nothing from the school about it, even now I have gotten no notice from the school that Brendan and the Tiger Toons group is having a program I had not planned to go. I guess I shoud have called the school about it, but Ii just thought it was one of those things that are small and from one class for another and not a public perfermance type of thing. Oh well. I am trying my best to get it right.

I think I will call Vicki. I just relized that I am freezing. love to you all. jk

Today is my day off. I did take the chidren to school, but Michael sr. has them for the rest of the day including picking them up after school. He does all of the homework and I have the whole day to myself. I went to get mani and a pedi. I just "tooled" around Newburgh and the eastern side of Evansville. That means that I drove very slowly and probably aggrivated all of the "rushers", if there any in Newburgh. Beautiful day and lovely to be just ambling along.

It appears that the mother is coming to get the boys for the week end and that she and the boys will be gong to church with me on Sunday. She asked if she could go and I said what I thought was the only thing I could say and that was "yes".

I got to talk to Vicki today during her lunch thirty minutes and that was an unexpected pleasure. I hope you all are having a wonderul day.

Talk to Lyndsey and find out what is new in the employment arena for her.

love you all, if you are still out there reading. jk

well, I plan to get a great start today, like getting to work before noon. I will begin right after I publish this post.

Once again, I feel I must report on the ride tro school The trees are beaautiful. It looked like a magazine layout of trees. I see huge trunked trees with perfect form of golden leaves that are continually falling silently like snow all under the expanse of the treee. I see a single tree with leaves of red, purple, green, orange, with a single yellow leaf. Tree after tree of God's handiwork. This s the most beautiful sight in Nature I have seen. Every day something has changed where the scene appears more beautiful that it was the day before. It is so awe inspiring and such a testiment to the mind of God to create such beauty. Leaves are fluttering to the gound like snowflakes in many places. Silent falling of beautiful, beautiful leaves. Signaling that autumn is ending. What lies ahead? Of course, I now it will be winter, but what will it look like? God's suprpise for me and for the rest of His people up here in Newburgh.

Love you. My day has begun. jk

Yikes! I've done it again--stayed on the computer checking on messages and now it is passed noon and I havent even showered today, much less gotten on with the chores. Michael is going to work today, so there will be no break today. I will leave you with your thoughts. Just know that I treasure each and every one who reads this blog. God is good. His love is everlasting. He will never leave us. It cannot get any better than that. jk

It's Ihursday morning and the boys are at school. Michael, on the bus and Brendan & Aidan were driven to school by me.



I stopped by the cleaners to pick up some stuff. Now I am home and reading my e-mail messages and checking the blogs of friends and now I am posting to you all. I have some private stuff to tell and I wish I could talk to Vicki, but she is at work and will not get off until around 4 pm. At that time I will probably be big into helping with homework. Oh well.



Yesterday turned out to be such a restorative day for me. Rest, rest, rest and all of it so peaceful. I feel like a million. I'll have to see how long it lasts after I begin the work of the day. I think Michael has to go to work today. He remains in bed asleep. I dont know how long he stayed up last night. He does, as I have reported to you, have great deal of difficulty getting to sleep and staying sleep. I know he has one of those prescription sleeping aids, but when one works different shifts, I guess the perscription is not always able to do what it espouses .



I am trying to methodically clean from one room to the next. I have been doing all over general cleaning and not really being able to see any long lasting impact. Now I am concentrating on one room at a time and then everyday gong back to the already cleaned rooms and doing a quick clean maintenance job and then attacking the next room. So far the cleaned rooms are my bedroom, the common bathroom up stairs, Michael's room and bathroom. Today I will go after the family room. After that I will attack the kitchen. This of course, means that the kitchen floor continues to be unmopped. Actually this method of cleaning is going along quite well. It really will end up, i think , requiring a lot of work daily, but then I can have days where I do major dusting, then a day of mopping and always straighteing, but the house can have general look of being properly cared for.

The basement is coming along ever so slowly. The bathroom tile has begun to be laid. I hope the guys return today. Of course, today is Thursday and usually this is the day that the main worker man returns to his home in Madison, Indiana, and returns back to Newburgh on Monday. I had hoped that it would be finished this week like they had said it would be. Once more, I believe them, but alas, it aint complete. Progress bit by bit I guess, is better than complete abandonment of the project. I guess.

Take care and have a wonderul day. I love you. jk

I just arose after a three hour nap. I slept like a rock. Michael handled the boys for the whole time when he got home from work today at 4pm. I feel refreshed and ready to go. Everyone is in bed. Michael sr. is in his room with the door shut, so it is just me, along with Zulu, who sleeps whereever I am (she is presently at the foot of my bed). Such silence and quiet. I love being here, but I seem to work, work, work and then crash. Boy what a refreshing crash it was. I bet I can go to bed in a bit and I will continue to sleep like a baby. Hopefully.

Please pray for this situation up here. Karen's toe is continuing to ooze and she takes her last antibiotic pill tomorrow. I am not sure if she has been able to go to work lately so i dont know what the situation is there. She told me today that she still plans to come to get the boys this week end. Her friend and his two children have moved back to his family home about an hour and a half from Indianapolis, so she is all alone up there. Please pray for God to guide this situation and to please protect these little boys while this situation is working itself out. Without God we are nothing and we truly have nothing. He alone is our Strength, our Refuge and our everpresent Help in times of trouble.

I am exhausted and it is time for me to go pick up the boys. My back is hurting so badly and I have take two aleve and hopefully that will soon give relief. It usually does. Sitting down completely releaves the pain. Oh well. jk

I've accomplished nothing today and it is noon. I did take the children to school, Michael is working the 6 to 3pm. shift today. I will pick up the boys and Mike will take over when I get the boys home.

The plumber did come and he has fixed the leak. Hopefully for good. There was a problem with the flow of the expelled water from the washing machine and the dishwasher that would overflow around the drain from the air conditioner unit. Oh well. You know how much I have said the washer is going and that the dishwasher is going. So that is why there was water on thef loor in the basement almost all of the time.

I have commented on Ronnie Wiggins' blog about the election and left a m,essage on Lyndsey's phone. I have watched the three postings on Sam's wholesale blog showing video footage of Andy's proposal to Jessica. You must see that. I wish you could also read my response on Ronnie Wiggins blog.

After I do some cleaning, I may post some more, but now I hear the sound of a mess somewhere calling me by name. love you. jk

Let me say this. I thought John Mc Cain's concession speech was wonderful. I was very proud to be an American last night. For the world to see cheering people in the streets all over America and no shooting or violence and then to see John MCain give such a wonderful concession speech in which he called Brack "his" president and promised to do whatever he could to support Barack as Barack leads our nation. What a wonderful thing for the world to see Democracy in action. Joy in our streets. Basrack calls himself a Christian and, while that fact can be questioned with many of the issues he espouses, he still calls himself a Christian. My prayer is that Obama call on the name of the Lord for guidance as he leads this nation. God is faithful to those who are called by his name. We must pray for Obama. I believe God can use Obama to bless this nation if Obama will listen to God. What else can we do? jk

It is morning and I have the morning "off" today so I have another day to respond to my many response givers, and to whom I owe so much joy and pleasure in my life, and another day to try to make myself mop the kitchen. Among yesterday's purchases was a box of wet pads for my swiffer mop which I will attemp to give it another go at trying to get he mop job done.

In response to Anony Mouse's querie:
I like the swiffer wet mop because it has a spray that goes out ahead of the mop head when you push a button and wets the immediate place you are mopping. I feel like a commercial when I am gliding about the floor mopping except for when I am really pushing my swiffer and the handle comes off, which seems to occur when I am really going at it and feeling like I am conquering the filth. Then of course, comes the let down that means that perhaps I am not the conquerer I had thought I was. It can be a real downer when your mopping expertise is shown to be so shoddy if you let it bring you down and your feeling of a lack of "value". So then I look for other ways to measure my "value". Make note that I do not measure my "virtue" by my mopping expertise, because my mopping experise is not a reflection of my "virtue". My "virtue" is expressed in my continued work to fulfill my goal of a clean kitchen floor. Because I have the "virtue" of doing all tasks well. Now for the raising of my sense of my value, I look at the stack of clothes that I have washed and I fold them and I find my sense of value is heightened.

Times are different now, I am not rewarding myself with a bite of something. I have lost an ounce or two in the past week. I tell you, life is good and is getting better.

I would like to take this moment to thank my comment friends. Your words of response to me lifted my spirits so high that I might get out the clorox wipes today and just see what good i can do. I am inspired.

Today has been another good day the Lord has made and I rejoice and am glad in it. Today I was "off" after I took the boys to school. We had a great drive and the trees are so beautiful. The leaves are all different colors and as one drives all of a sudden one sees a tree that has solid gold leaves and it is perfect in form. It is breath taking. God is truly awesome in His imagination when He created the living plants. In His wisdom He gave us eyes so we could see and enjoy the wonder of His handiwork. His handiwork is so obvious in Newburgh.

I have made an appointment for the boys and I to have our picture taken on November 11, because the school is having a holiday to honor the veterans. How wonderful that somewhere in America Veterans Day is still a special day. Newburgh is really "where its at".

I then went to Linens 'N Things which is going out of business and purchased a few items. Then I filled the car with gas and went to Walgreens where I purchased some items again. I tooled around Newburgh and drove down her 30 mph streets and just enjoyed my day. I got home at 4:30 and the boys were called from hither and yon to unload the car, so life is good.

Michael went to work for a few hours tonight to work on some charts. Evidently he is way behind on charts. When Michael was in the hospital with a tube down his throat, a friend of his told me about his need to do some of his charts. She said there were tons of hours of work for him to do and she could help with some of it, but most of it he would have to do himself because the notes were too hard for her to decipher. So when he works he has charts to do, and then he has all of these other charts he has to do from days gone by. He has notes, as I understand it, but some of the notes needed to be decifered by him and him alone. Oh well. I am hoping he can see the end of the tunnel. I know he is feeling better about his monthly financial situation aftern this week's pay check. (Not on easy street with money to burn, but out from under the pile of life's mounting bills. Once again I am so glad to be able to be up here.

Dont know what I will fix for supper yet, but I have a lot to choose from. I have milk and juice and eggs for tomorrow morning. It just cant get much better than this.

Did I tell you that the boys had to memorize a Bible verse for this past Sunday and they both said they were one of the few in their class that memorized it. The verse was John 15:5.

Their mother is supposed to come this weekend and that will mean that they will not be going to church with me. This Friday Michael jr. is supposed to have a boys' movie night at school as a result of a fund raiser at school. They boys won. I am supposed to have him there at 5;30p.m. and their mother has said she will pick him up at 8p.m. We will have to wait and see how things work out for her on Friday. She has had a very bad spider bite on her toe that has prevented her from being able to fulfill some of her statements to the boys.

It is difficult to count on everything because she doesnt really know sometimes until the last minute how she will be doing. We have gotten pretty good at making the necessary adaptations since it always involves what is best for the boys and they are not ever at fault for a last minute change in plans.

I love this daylight savings time. I love the early darkness. The coolness of the evening. Our temperature gets up to the 70's in the day. Beautiful weather. Beautiful people. love to you.

Aint you going to comment no more? Have you forgotten my need for comments which i use as my assessment of my value in the world of blog?

well it is 4 a.m. and I cant sleep. Brendan is asleep at the foot of my bed and my medicine is under the desk seat and I cant get to it. I dont know if that has anything with my inablility to sleep at this time, but i just mentioned. I may just be giddy because I know that Michael sr. will take over tomorrow since he is not working.
I tried to mop the kitchen floor a minute or two ago but I am unable to locate the "fillers" for my swiffer mop, which, by the way I think is a joke of a mop. I am just trying to find something other that a slop bucket and a regular mop. Oh well, Maybe I will fumble over Brendan's sleeping form and climb back into bed and just see what happens. love you. jk

For Sunday morning breakfast, we ate croissants and sausage with diet sprite served as a representative of the "juice" family. We got to church at 9, which is when it begins. and I had had to leave the house without make-up for us to be on time. I took Michael jr. and Aidan to their class and Brendan to children's church in the "big room" upstairs while I went to church. As usual, it was wonderful with me feeling like I worshipped my Lord and my God with tears streaming down my face at points. Then when church is over, it is time for Brendan to move to his class and for Michael jr and Aidan to go to children's church in the big room. At this time, I went to adult class, which is the first time I have been to class. It was a great class. The group was in their second day of a two day study of Revelations 6. Very meaty. Makes me want to study more about Revelation.

Then the children and I went to the butcher shop and got some staples for our meals. I still need eggs, milk and juice, but I wll get that some other time. Probably from Walgreens since I detest going to the grocery so much.

The weather is beautiful and the boys are out playing with their friends. Michael sr. will go to work today at 4 till 1. Then he will be off on Monday and should be off for several days. This means I fix the boys brekfast and take them to school but Michael Sr. picks them up and does the rest of the day. I will cook supper, but I will have the whole day off. I will probably do wash and some cleaning, but without the dedline of having to gt everything done by 2 when i lae to goget the boysl I may een go shopping and /or getmy nails anbd toes done, Who knows, It is my time,. I rest better on these days. No pressure at all,

I hope you have a wonderful day today and are able to spread some of the joy that is in your heart. love to you. jk

What a beautiful day. I am rested and ready for the day with my grandsons. Our plan is to try to find something in the house for breakfast so we dont have to go out, and then to go to church together. It has the promise of being a wonderful day. Thank you, God, for making the night when we can rest these wonderful bodies You have given us. Blessed be the name of the Lord. jk

Supper is over, the dishes are in the dishwasher which is running as I write. The babies have showered and are watching tv before bed. Michael jr. just came in and asked me if there was anything I needed help with. I immediately began to cry. I must be so tired. I fixed chicken & rice and macronni & cheese, which I know was not the most nourishng of meals, but I had all the indgredients here at home which meant i didnt have to go to the grocery store, so that is what i served. They liked it.

I really have been a bit emotional today. Perhaps feeling sorry for myself and the never ending job I have taken on. I am 62 you know. Loads of wash have been done, and clothes have been dried and towels have been folded and put up. Now the second load of towels the boys and I have used today are ready to hit the washing machine. I think I keep thinking I will get caught up, but evidently with living people in the house, that doesnt occur. I would rather be with those who are living than on duty with the lifeless.,

Funny things do happen during the day and we all laugh. The kitchen floor is really getting to me, but I really dont have the energy to get it done., Michael jr. said he liked to mop, but I thanked him and said he didnt need to but thank you for asking.

Today Ii have been bit of a gripe to the boys and that alwys makes me feel less than wonderful. The boys are not perfect and all of you that know me know that I am partial to perfect. Please pray for me.

Did you read Matthew's comment on the blog before this one. His statement was a gift to me. I love Matthew so much as well a Michael. Matthew is the great secret of our family since you all are not able to be around him much at all. He is funny and so good...... most of the time. just kidding, He is my delight.

My back is killing me and I am not over eating. Perhaps that's the problem. My lack of over eating, which I have always done to help me handle stress and used as a crutch to help me avoid dealing things i should deal with is now causingme to deal with what is going on and so i cry instead of chew. I guess i should think that i would rather cry than feel the horrible stuffed feeling i have felt for so long.

I have moved my commputer into the kitchen and that is why I have been able to get on it so frequently today. oh well.

i love you. We get an extra hour of sleep tonight. Aint life grand? I am going to bed. jk

My mercy! The sun is up again and the boys are up an energetic as usual. I have fixed breakfast and the dishes are in the dishwasher and we are all in bed trying to take a nap. I hope they all go to leep. Brendan is in sleeping with his daddy. Please pray for Michael sr. He says he is unable to sleep due to the pain in his arm. This is the same pain he had prior to going to Scotland and prior to having the first surgery. He has worked for the last 10 days out of 11 and he is tired, I can tell. He has to work today and tomorrow and he is off on Monday, but I don't know for how long.

I am so tired. Really really tired. Physically tired. The work really seems to never end and these boys are definitely not neat freaks although Michael jr. gets on a cleaning jag every once in a while and helps. The kitchen floor continues to be so bad. Maybe I will be able to take care of it today. The problem is that I am going to have to go to the store today and I dread going to the store. Oh well, this truly is a blessing in my life that I am being given the privilege to stay up here and help Michael and to take care of the boys. I need to concentrate on this.

I'm taking a nap. jk